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Tue, 01/05/2016 - 12:00am By:
Mother's Day...the day our kids make us adorable handmade gifts from school...the day we get spoiled and don't have to cook supper...the day our husband gets us a thoughtful gift like a day to the spa...the day we recognize and cherish as a mother. Our children made us mothers and motherhood is something so special, so precious, and so beautiful. We know this about being a mother every day, but we especially enjoy the world acknowledging us and speaking about how much love mothers have for their children.
But what if, you had to spend Mother's Day without one of your children? What if one of your children would never be with you on Mother's Day again? Well, I am one of those mothers. I am a bereaved Mother. And as I am writing this post (May 1) it is actually International Bereaved Mother's Day. A day for me and all the other mother's out there grieving for one of their children. Longing for our aching arms to hold our child again, to smell her, touch her precious hands, hear her sweet voice, and tell her that we love her. For there is no force on earth that could ever change the love a mother has for her child; not even death.
This is our day to acknowledge and celebrate ourselves as Bereaved Mothers; without the handmade gifts. :( One week before Mother's Day, we celebrate how we mother our children from afar. We both honour and celebrate a truly difficult day. For me, Mother's Day is a similar celebration.
Mother's Day for me does involve happy and joyful moments with my two girls still here with me, Alivia and Anaya. I will enjoy and cherish the handmade gifts they give me. I will love every minute of our day together, as I always treasure each and every day with them. It will be a special time.
Mother's Day will also involve a sad trip out to Regina Memorial Gardens. There I will spend some time with my Ava in her final resting place. It will also be a special time.
Mother's Day will also have some sad moments as I will wish all my three girls were here with me. There is no doubt I will have tears as I will long to have what will never be.
But I am also getting stronger in my journey of healing. I understand how precious life truly is and how important it is to enjoy and live in the moment. That was one of Ava's many gifts to me.
So, what does Mother's Day mean to me? It means it is a gift to be a mother. It means that even though, Ava is no longer here in my arms, I am still her mother. It means that I still get to be a mother to Alivia and Anaya and so I will make the most of that. It means that I will think and long for Ava on this day, even more than I usuallly do (if that is even possible!). But most importantly, I will celebrate the fact that Ava made me a mother!
Happy Mother's Day to all of you who hold your children in your arms and in your hearts.
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